Monday, July 25, 2011

Times I Tasted a Shoe

  • When I described catheters as being lovely.
  • When I used the words bacon and gangrene in the same sentence at the dinner table.
  • Describing milk on the verge of going sour as "it being dry, but you can drink it, but not really".
  • When I refused to believe a patient named George* was actually George* when he looked more like a Georgina.
  • Complaining when I needed to put another hole in a friend's belt that was much too large for me.
  • When talking to a colleague about suicidal patients that had missed their appointments and saying "I hoped they hadn't taken the easy way out".
  • When I honestly believed the lyrics of a popular song were "sweet dreams are made of cheese".
*Name has been changed.

That's all.

What I have learnt in Durban...thus far..

(This post may contain broad sweeping statements but as  this is my blog I am entitled to make them)
  • It is ok to end all your sentences with the word 'but'.
  • Durban dialect is contagious.
  • Indians are the most hospitable people you will ever meet.
  • The drug of choice here is 'sugars' and no it isn't the sugar you put in your tea (been there, done that, asked the stupid question).
  • Indians really do make curry out of everything: mangos, mushroom, green bananas, jack fruit, herbs that look more like weeds...
  • Some days you do feel as if you are living in a foreign country: it's warm in winter, monkeys roam the streets, palm trees are the natural vegatation...
  • Zulus are not as friendly as Tswanas and on their bad days they can be quite intimidating (lucliky I don't scare as easily as I used to).
  • Afrikaans is practicly extinct in this province.
  • Durbanites do not own winter clothes and live in denial that it could ever get very cold or wet in Durban. After a long stormy week in KZN the crazy Capetonian in a raincoat and gum boots had the last laugh.
  • Durbanites take personalized number plates to an entirely different level for example : SMELLY and BEANZ.
And no matter where I go some things will never change...
  • Matrons still have the personality of blob fish (its the ugliest animals alive according to National Geographic).
  • I am still known as the little girl but I have also inherited the new nickname of Cape Town ( I hope it is a compliment).

That's all.

Monday, July 18, 2011

Say what?!

During a game of Pictionary (that turned into a form of 30 Seconds...) the following conversation took place:

OT: Ok, what is another word for a pair of glasses that your read with?

Patient: TESTICLES!

That's all.

Sunday, July 17, 2011

A Friend in a Million

Random people clearly gravitate towards each other...
  • She can have Nandos for breakfast, lunch and supper.
  • She asks for a finger bowl at Ocean Basket and reminds me of Donkey in Shrek 2. 
  • She used the line "We just popped in to pick up some people" when describing how the aircraft she was traveling in landed at an International Airport in Singapore to collect more passengers.
  • At varsity some friends dared her to 'Drop it Like it's Hot' and she agreed...
  • She regularly orders hake at Spur STEAK Ranch and is disappointed EVERY time.
  • She loves me unconditionally, even if I forget her anniversary.
  • She has helped me become a better OT, friend and Muslim.
  • She let me borrow her new sari she hadn't worn yet, to wear to a party (by the way I rocked that sari)!
  • She sends the longest smses ever, my mobile still receives part of the text three days later...
  • She uses words like seductive and sultry to describe me.
  • She nearly jumped out of her skin each time she came to visit and my affectionate maltese poodle was on the loose in the garden.
  • She describes her bodily functions, in detail, always educational conversations...
  • She is one of the most generous people I know. If she had R100 she would give you R99 and keep R1 for herself (she gets annoyed with people who don't share their strawberries).  
  • She called me from her honeymoon... just to say hello.
  • She has seen me at my best of times and at my worst of times and rooted for me all the way.
  • She measures the attractiveness of men by the length of their noses. The longer the better...eish.
  • Up until very recently she still listened to Savage Garden and Bryan Adams. I kid you not!
  • On the day we handed in the final draft of our thesis she still did not know how to paraphrase or reference.
  • She is COMPLETELY oblivious to how beautiful she is both inside and out!

This is, without a doubt, one of my friendships that 'transcends time' and I can't wait for her to have babies so I can tell them all the stories about their crazy mother.


That's all.

Saturday, July 16, 2011

Guess who's back, tell a friend...

Forgive me, it has been nearly three months since my last post. Since then I have changed provinces, jobs and my internet connection. You can look forward to regular chronicles in the near future.


Watch this space...


That's all.