Why Stan is the Man

Stan* is the hospital messenger who puts a smile on my face daily for the following reasons:

• He drives a bright yellow heister without great speed or agility unfortunately.
• He is very short and stout and reminds me of a teapot, an Indian teapot.
• He has perfected the art of visiting our department at the exact second we sit down to have lunch or tea.
• He is nearly as old as the hospital and has many historical tales to tell.
• On hot days he wears a sombrero and I often find myself shouting 'Ola Speedy Gonzales!' across the parking lot.
• He is petrified of a feisty elderly female patient in the ward and refuses to deliver to that ward if she is on the prowl.
• He sneakily steals our tea and sugar and just as we begin to get suspicious he brings us a donation of tea bags or sugar (that he has most likely nicked from another ward).
• He puts my aircon on in the morning so by the time I get into my office it is nice and cool.
• On Friday afternoons when the Psych Department is deserted it is comforting to know that he is sitting outside my door drinking his tea.
• When we praise him he helps us (or does his job).
• He can cook amazing open fire veg biriyani in those big pots. 
• He often gets hurt. I know this isn't a laughing matter but the situations he finds himself in often amuses me. He has: rolled down the uneven corridors leading to the wards one to many times, has gotten attacked by a swarm of bees and has rolled down a hill while trying to escape some unruly strikers.

*Name has been changed to protect confidentiality.

That's all.